Me and my Bullshit

It's 2:46 am, and I can't sleep.

I am tired as hell, but my body refuses to rest. Isn't that awesome?

Well, tomarrow I will be leaving at 10 pm. It will be the first time on a plane.

I wish they could be something to blog about, but I'm not really thinking anything, which can be considered a blissing since half my thoughts arn't worth thinking, and the rest are compeletely bullshit anyways. Does that make since?


If I were an object I'm thinking I would be mush at the moment. Swamp mush to be exact. What would you be?

Me and my A-Sexuality.

I think I'm asexual.

It's not so much that I can't like anyone -- I have, and will most likely do again -- but I seem to be the only person I know who doesn't obsess over a guy (or other person). Ok, that is a bit of a lie. I do obsess over guys I know I will never never meet, and I keep it to myself.

Is it weird I don't need a romantic relationship?



Ps. (To Lizzie) It's not mandatory you read every thing, but if you do.... good luck. (:


Also, I'm going to be going to New York for two weeks. (Not New York City,Syracuse )

Useless

So, I just blogged about my DMV test experience, and although I think I sound rather perky in it, I'm not. If anything, imagine a big gray clouds condensed over one person constantly changing from anger to shame to saddens. That is my emotion on it.

So, in other news, I was once again spending my time surfing though blogs, (did you know when you do the "next blog" button on my page, you get a minimum of 20 "It's awesome to be a mom" blogs. You will know what I mean if you ever see one. What says "mom" about my blog? I don't think I even want kids in the future...

Anyways, I think did the nifty searched for shared interests. (this time on Cinema Bizarre) I have realized I dislike when people post boring quiz things. So, in an attempt to cure my boredom, here is a not to-boring quiz thingy about things you never needed to know about me. (:



1.When showering, do you start the water and then get in, or get in then start the water?
Well, since this question is creepy, let me answer in far to much detail.
I first undress. Then I turn on then water. Then shampoo. Then I shave my legs. Then I use soap or shower gel to clean my body.

2.Do you read the labels on your shampoo bottle?
While shampooing? Yes. That is why I buy the ones with characteristics. (:

3.Do you moan in the shower like the people on the Herbal Essences commercial?
No. I do not. >.>

4.Have you ever showered with someone of the opposite sex?
No, just the same sex. I know how many people we can fit in my best friend's shower (:

5.Have you ever been forced to shower with one of your siblings?
no.

6.Have you ever brushed your teeth in the shower?
Actually, no. O.o I am very tempted to go do that now. Thanks.

7.Have you ever dropped your soap on your foot?
yes. It hurt.
8.How old do you look?
Some old lady thought I was 20. My Aunt thinks I have been 12 for the last 4 years.

9.How old do you act?
Currently? 6 1/3.

10.What's the last song you sang?
It's Raining Men.
Good I wish it was....

11.Have you recently become a member of anything?
hmm... no. Should I?

12.What are your plans for the weekend?
A concert! (:

13.Do you kiss with your eyes open or closed?
Why? Are you planing to kiss me Mr. (ms.?) anonymous-computer-quiz-giver?

14.Whats the sexiest thing about Condoleeza Rice?0_o

15.Does anything on your body itch right now?
my arm foo!

16.Who's the sexiest famous woman alive?
hmmm.... I'm not sure....
The actress from Repo! The Genetic Opera has it going on.

17.Who's the sexiest famous man alive?
Oh lord...bill..no...tom... no.... Kaulitz twi... no... Shin?

18.Does every family have a crazy uncle?
mine does... they all have some relative who is out of there damn mind. My family is full of them. (:

19.Have you ever smuggled something into America?
Well, I have yet to been out of America... so yes.

20.Does playing the guitar make a girl/guy more attractive?
Oh, most definitely. :3

21.Do you live in a city with a good sports team?
-.- ha ha. Your joke is funny.

22.Have you ever finished off the popcorn and ate the junk from the bottom of the bag?
Who hasn't?

23.Have you ever had sex in a tent?
No?
What the hell happened to #24?

25.Have you ever dated a Goth?
No?

27.Can you fix your own car?
I don't have a car.
But, I am lucky if I can put gas in a car with out fucking it up.

28.Would you want to kill George W. Bush yourself if you were guaranteed to get away with it?
well, it would not currently matter now would it?

29.Should guys wear pink?
Why the hell not?

Picture of the Day

Bad DMV man....

So, I forgot how much of a tempter my father had. Or how protective he was of me. But don't fret, I was reminded.

So, I went down to Sacramento, because I wanted to get my licenses before I left for New York. and that was the only place I could get an appointment before I left. Well, you know the stereotype for DMV people? The instructor I got was even worse.

So, I get up at 6:30 am so I can make my appointment at 10:10 pm.

It started with him flipping the fuck out because my dad tried to introduce himself to the guy. Now, since I'm assuming you don't know my father, he is a very (overly) friendly person, so he talks to everyone. Plus, he wanted to know who this creepy middle age man who was going to disappear with his 16 year old daughter was. (also, who to kill if something went wrong... but that's a different story.) So, the guy started to yell at my dad. I believe it was along the lines of "SIR! BACK AWAY FROM THE CAR! I AM TALKING TO THE GIRL! BACK AWAY!" Now, I could understand if we were some where dangerous, or he didn't know he was my father, but he had gotten out of the car to talk to The Guy. Because my dad loves me, he did as he was told, and did not tell the guy to fuck off, which I know was difficult for him, but he wanted me to pass.

Then The Guy tried to say my blinker didn't work. It did. So, my father raised a tiny bit of hell, and got a second tester person to tell him he was wrong. ( My blinker did work. He just didn't want to get into the car with me. I'm not sure why -- I had spent an hour and a half cleaning the car, and vacuuming it so it would be presentable for the person.)

So, The Guy was forced to get into the car with me. I then spent two minutes with him glaring at me, like he was trying to set me on fire with his mind. He then told me to pull over to the curb. So I did. He then freaked out, and practically yelled at me to get closer. So I did. Consequently, I hit the curb. And got an automatic fail.

Sadly, that is not the end of my story. The Guy then continued to mark me down for shit I didn't do, all the way back to DMV. He marked me down for not fully being in the bike line when turning right. Last tine I checked, only half of my car fits in that lane. So I guess my mother not owning a smaller car takes points off the test. You know how when you turn left, you pull up and turn? Well, I had a green light. I pulled up. A car going the opposite way zoomed up and turned before me, so I slowed down, and The Guy flipped out : "Stop! STOP!!! STOOPP!!". Am I the only one who thinks it's weird he kept yelling after I had already stopped?

So, I parked, and he told me I failed, while glaring at me. I didn't handle this well. I am sad to say I started to tear up, and slammed my car door shut. I get out too. Meanwhile, my dad had walked up, and was standing directing in front, middle of the car.

In retrospect, it was funny as hell. My dad was standing there, far beyond livid, debating wither to kick the guys ass, (he could have easily killed him. Not just because of there size difference, but my father does have a rather long list of past fights. In fact, I'm not sure how he has never been in jail. Then again, he hasn't been in a fight for years. Also, he never fought in front of me..) or come hug me. Now, my dad is not exactly the most intimating guy normally, (and he is far less as intimidating now, compared to when I was younger) but when he is really mad, he face turns this red color, and a vein pops out in his forehead. (This is typically angry, (and he is rarely angry) this is livid, seeing red, going to kill someone mad.) Also, (he is about 5'8) he is very Native American looking. (because he is. I take after my mom.) The Guy was this tiny little Asian man. I think if I hadn't ran up and hugged him, he would have beaten the shit out of The Guy for making me cry. The Guy, seeing me hugging my dad, ran inside of DMV.

Even though my dad made the guy shit himself, I still feel like a failure for failing.

In some weird (morbid?) way I think my dad is really sweet for almost beating the crap out of some guy for making me cry.

Story Time?

So, I have deiced to finally post a story I wrote. I picked one I thought one that was alright; not amazing, but not horrid. I have also shown it to a few friends, and they all generally liked it. (I guess...) Plus, it is one of the less morbid, and sad stories. Tell me your honest opinion?

The Ledge

Standing on the ledge she felt the cold breeze rush past her face, blowing her long wavy auburn hair out of her face, and leaving goose bumps up and down her bare arms, reminding her that she was still alive. Closing her eyes she stood, allowing her senses to fully enjoy the wind. As the gusts of air whirled around her, she sensed all the places it had been, like the buttery sweet smell of Canada, the blackish-green vision of the sea that is perpetually covered with storms, and the minty coolness of the artic. One crisp, sun dried brown leaf swirled around her, before creasing her cheek with its brittle, leathery texture, and then falling down, as the wind moved on without it. Without opening her eyes opening her eyes she caught it as it became waist height. She stood there, unmoving as she silently said her goodbyes to her friend who never judged, never overlooked her, never belittled her, and always completely understood her. She said goodbye to the wind.

Slowly prying her eyes open she looked down at the tiny piece of dead foliage she still held in her hand. Its veins were not sunk in, nor were they protruding out. They were slightly faded, as if trying to hide. One of the three tips looked like it had been brutally ripped off, while another looked as if it had just given up, and fallen off. There were no remains of the steam.

Staring at this irrelevant plant, she began to feel pathetic. Why should she be identifying with something as stupid as a leaf? Just because it was alone? Because it seemed to be fed up with the world it was born into? Because it was never truly understood, in any way? Because it had long ago given up any small shriveled hope of finding any living being that could? And it was just now so fed up with the loneliness that ate away at its soul, every second of every day, that it was willing to put itself out of its own misery? That it was about to be put out of its misery?

In a spurt of pity for the poor dead greenery, and irrational anger at herself for personifying a leaf with all of her personal problems, she mercilessly crushed it, and put it out of its desolation. Letting go she watched as the bits and pieces slowly floated the twenty four stories down to earth. The only question left now, was wither or not she would follow, or if she would have the courage to try to survive another day.

False Advertising SUCKS.

So, I have found a new annoyance. I was surfing though blogs, and I kept having the same problem. You know how when you click on some one's picture/name it takes you to there profile and from there you go to the blog? (In case you don't, that's how it happens.) Well, I would find someone, and notice everything was in English on there profile. Then I would travel to there blogs only to realize it was in a different language completely.

Now, what I ask is what type of foolery is that?! (For the record, I consider it as false advertisement.) I (sadly) only speak English, so when I see people who talk about what they like and such, in English, and then there entire -- not just one or two blogs -- are in Spanish, Russian, German, or another of the various languages, it annoys me immensely.



On a completely different note, it seems like there are a lot of Tokio Hotel fans from Argentina on here. Also, I find Argentina extremely hard to spell.

Well, anyways, here is a lovely picture.

Put some clothes on, please.

I think the majority of the female population -- of my age group -- has lost there damn minds. The majority can pretty much be categorized into there "looks". The sad thing is that they -- most of them any ways -- have a mind of there own, yet they insist on dressing -- for a lack of better terms -- skanky. I don't have anything against it. If that's how you want to dress, that is totally up to you. I even think some outfits are kind of cute. But it seems like everyone dresses like that. I mean what happened to, I don't know, leaving things to the imagination? Modesty? (self-respect?)

I feel that I should classify what I am calling sknaky. If you are wearing shorts/a skirt that your ass practically hangs out of, it's skanky. If the end of the cloth of clothing stops an inch or less from your vagina, it's skanky. You get the picture?

I just love the excuses some people use as to why they dress the way they do.

1) "It's hot."
I know it's hot. It's summer time. Just because it is hot, does not give you an excuses to dress like that. I don't dress that way, and I still have outfits that keep me cool, while covering my skin a decent amount.

2) "I'm comfortable with my body."
Ok, half the time that is a load of bullshit. For the other half of the people; well, I'm glad your comfortable with yourself, but that is not an excuses to run around a mere mile away from naked. Have some respect for yourself -- it is ok to be picky over who sees your body in all its glory.

or my personal favorite...

3) "It's sexy/fashion."
(I have literally been told both of these things.) First of all, I know some guys find this style... attractive, but there are more classy ways of dressing that are sexy. It is also fashion -- trashy fashion in my opinion -- but there are thousands of different kinds of fashion. Obviously if you were so "fashion forward" then you wouldn't use the "word" fashion with the sole definition of this style of dressing.


I'm not saying we need to be covered head to toe. In fact in a weird way I find it comforting when people show some skin. (I'm currently wearing a denim skirt that goes to a few inches above the knee, and a black, spaghetti strap shirt with a V-neck. I'm not even saying no one should ever dress like that, but if the majority, or even half of your clothes are like this way, consider what you are wearing.

I'm not one to judge someone by what they are wear, but you must admit that those close don't radiate a sense of self-respect, or class. I'm not saying you don't have it -- it is just very cleverly hidden.

The sadist part is that these girls can look just as "sexy" in other outfits. They could be so much more then "sexy" in other clothes -- they could show there beauty.

FML

So, today was fine in till recently. I got home from baby sitting and was them immediately bitched at by my father because my report card came in. I had one C, one C- and one D. Everything else was a B+ or higher, (out of 7 classes) but he flipped a bitch. (just wait in till he finds out I won't be taking Spanish again. It is quite possible he will drop dead from pure rage.) Then, because the driving secretary found it convenient to just not give me a date for my driving thing, I went down to the meeting place to see if anyone walked up to him. My father told me, the whole way there and back how stupid I am for not getting the date right. While we were waiting he decided that would be a perfect time to pace around the car, while bitching at me. Did I mention he was practically yelling? So my driving teacher heard, and the girl whose appointment was today. Did I mention that this is the bitch from hell that magically ended up in practically all my class last year? To make it even better, I made this one mistake driving. I went to pull out of a little drive way thingy in a parking lot, and I didn't swing narrow enough, and magically a car then decided to go into the turn lane at that exact moment. So, I had to back up, in the middle of the road, and fix the situation. Needless to say this just added to the list of reasons my father was calling me stupid. It stings just a little bit more, because usually it is my dad on my side.

I'm thinking I need to get away from this god forsaken house for a few days.

But where can I go?

Dull...

I got three new movies yesterday. One was dull, on I have yet to watch, and the other was just plain bad. It kindda pissed me off.

I'm home alone in till about 1, but I have this weird flu thingy.

Also, I have realized when I move out no one will baby me when I'm sick. That fucking sucks.

So, that's about it. I think I'm going to go watch that third movie...

Picture of the Day

I love people, but incapable of understanding.

I am either painfully sane, or completely out of my mind. Either way, the rest of the human-race is the opposite.

There are so many things that I just do not understand that mass groups of people do/think. I guess it wouldn't bug me if they didn't understand too, but they do. I am told it is the reverse with me. (by most of my family) I do understand I do things out of the norm, but they seem like commonsense to me.

It is just so god damn frustrating, because I can understand other people who do other things -- Sometimes even when I wish I didn't. I can understand how Hitler's claims could be found appealing to a German after World War One. I can understand the cannibalism that the Donner Party resorted to. I can understand a variety of reasons that Jack the Ripper might have killed, but I can not under stand things like, picking a town completely monotonous to visit when there are much more entertaining towns an hours distance to the north and south. I can not understand how people don't except change (not like, but except).

It is mind boggling to me.

It also pisses me off to no end.

On a personal note, Six flags was incredibly fun. Me and TayLor only got though half the park because we had to leave early due to my dad not feeling well. I have a season pass, and a few more free passes, so we will go again. We did go though all the major rides though.

Here is a nifty fact for you: Germany is amazing at making rides. I somehow ended up sitting by the little signs that tell the weight, and where they were made, and things of that sort on everything but the roller coasters. The majority were made in Germany, including my favorite: Voodoo. I think I want to visit Germany now for the sole reason of there amusement parks. If they can make these intensely, epic rides and ship them across the sea I can only imagine what they can create for something that doesn't need to be shipped though air or water...

This is Vodoo. It spins you one way in a large circle, while spinning you in another smaller circle.

Picture of the Day

Waiting....

So, this is me typing in my pure boredom. I'm waiting for my TayLor to show up, but it is going to be a while because she had to drive her mom to the doctors' because she broke her arm. (her mom, not TayLor.)


My house is currently empty, and as much is I am tempted to crank some music up obscenely loud, I have the remains of a headache, so in till the Tylenol I took fully kicks in, it is just soft, humble music.


In other news, I am not exactly looking forward to the hour (plus?) drive to Six Flags with my parents. While I do love them, I have learned that them not knowing much about my life outside the family (and some inside of it) plus friends usually doesn't end well. But my TayLor is part of the family, so I will just be a little tense. She (like most of my friends) knows my parents don't know everything, but she doesn't know exactly how much so she has to work on not spilling things they don't know, and not be surprised at what they do know. She is actually really good at it now.

My parents are also very, very touchy about certain subjects. Most of my friends have no idea in hell which topics to avoid at all costs, which is a safe to talk about, and which just to lie about, (there aren't many of the last) but she is so amazingly good at reading the small little nervous habits I have when we get near certain subjects, that my parents don't even have time for them to remotely register in there brains before she changes the topic. Even when I'm not there she is pretty bomb at knowing where to draw the line.

I guess its not so much the drive with my parents and TayLor. It's just the drive. Maybe I will drive there, hence taking my mind off of it?


So, does anyone else think it is hilarious that Adam Lambert has a crush on Bill Kaulitz? I'm not sure why I find this amusing, but I do.

Also, I have short term memory loss. Every time I log in I will get all excited and be all "hey! look! A new blog!" and then click on it, with out reading the little glimpse of it first. Consequently I go to the same blog more often then not. I also get kind of pissed off, because I will read the first sentence, and then be all "CRAP! I already read this!" and then angrily go back to my "dashbord" to repeat the same mistake with a blog below it, at least one more time.


Here are some picture that make me happy.

And Gustav said "Let there be water!"

I will kiss... you.

Does anyone else sometimes miss the mane?


Back evil beast! back from whence you came!


Anyone else see Luminor giving Shin the eye?

Why are there no guys at my school like that?

Just Shin. Nuff' said.

Sexy pose Jr.

Sexy Pose Sr.

Yes. I enjoy this one. ;)
Does anyone else think Shin is planing a sad game of pike-a-boo?

Strify: "You got something.... right there..."

Just... Yes.

I made those. :)

Can I have Sprinkels with that?

Screw the god damn box. Even if --in my hypothetical world which is much cooler then this one-- it began to hail and snow, while twisters were tearing apart the land, I would not go into the stupid box. Even it was made out of metal, and was filled with muffins, pandas, and the Kaulitz Twin's clones. (I don't think they would go into the box?)

This whole weekend --or rather since I got out of school Friday -- I have been giving people other options to a situation, and they look at me like I'm on crack, before muttering out something along the lines of "that's interesting" and then completely ignoring me for the rest of the conversation. Finally, my sister and brother-in-law were talking, and I gave some third choice to my brother, and he just stared at me. After an awkward (only for me, because they were staring) moment he told me (or something along these lines) "Way to think out side of the box". That one little statement lead to a half hour discussion about me being a "free thinker". I personally like my sister's short little statement: "When the hell has she ever been in the damn box?". (And in case you are wondering, they took my suggestion, which ended up in me babysitting.)

They had a point, I guess. I don't see myself as a "free thinker", but apparently everyone else does. I guess it is because people pick two choices (most of the time the glaringly obvious ones) and force themselves to pick between the two. I do not understand why people do this to themselves. I would at least like to know all of my options (unless there is one that just works perfectly for me). I'm not saying I know all of my options. In fact, I'm pretty sure I miss a lot of them most of the time, but at least I am willing to accept that there are other choices.